An Alien Concept?

Hey, y’all! Would anyone care to tell me where February went? Anyway, to borrow from the movie Poltergeist II, I’m baaaaaack.

Hollywood is wrapping up awards season. The Oscars were just on last weekend and, from what I’ve heard and the clips I’ve watched, it was a pretty fantastic show. (I’m looking at you, Matthew Mc.)

Since I love confessing all my transgressions, inadequacies, and failings to y’all (we’re friends, right?), here’s another: I’m really not much of a movie watcher. At all. I enjoy them, but if given the choice between watching a Best Picture nominee or a Texas Rangers baseball game, I’m choosing the small ball. Every time. In fact, anytime I have insomnia, all I have to do is put in a DVD and I’m out in 5 minutes. I’ve seen the beginning of Bull Durham no fewer than 12 times.

Speaking of movies, do y’all remember seeing clips from those crazy 1950s and 1960s sci-fi movies? You know, they’re the ones with the spaceships that look like two pie plates stapled together. Anyway, I am happy that those movie aliens studied good grammar manuals instead of reality TV shows to learn their English. How do I know? They were correct in saying:

The leader, sitting on his throne in the palace might, I imagine, order his guards, “Bring the aliens to me!” And that would be correct too.

What’s my point? It seems that “bring” and “take” tend to trip folks up these days. Here’s the key:

You have to BE where the item is to BE BROUGHT in order to use BRING.
If you’re TOTING something TO another location (not the place you are currently standing), then you will TAKE it there.

Now wasn’t that easy?

Henceforth, whenever you get a brochure from a drug company asking you to “bring” it with you when you visit your doctor, you’re allowed to cringe. And when your daughter who is sitting right beside you asks if you’ll “bring” her to a friend’s house, you can tell her no. And then ground her for improper usage. (I kid, I kid.)

Missed y’all! Mean it.

P.S.
Could someone bring me a glass of wine?